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Living in the U.S. (International Trainees and Non-U.S. Citizens)

Resource:  International Graduate and J-1 Orientation Manual for Living in the U.S.

Resource:  Living in Chattanooga - A Guide for New and Returning Students, Residents, and Fellows

Living in a community with people from all over the world can be a positive, indifferent, or negative experience, depending on how you want to approach it.  We would like to help make your relationships here pleasant and educational rather than tense and unproductive.

Building Understanding
The essential first step to successful intercultural communication is to concentrate on understanding rather than judging the other person. If both parties do this, then any cause for mutual anxiety is eliminated. Both parties are free to know each other rather than worrying about their personal insecurities in dealing with people whose cultures differ from their own.

How do we seek this understanding? Usually, of course, it is by communicating or talking with the other person. When the other person is talking, you are trying to figure out what he/she means by the words he or she chooses and the accompanying behavior. This process is more complex when the other person is different from you. Words will not mean the same things to both of you, since differences in your cultural backgrounds mean that particular words and ideas don't have the same significance for both of you.

Another topic about which cultures teach different assumptions is the concept of the individual. U.S. citizens are taught to admire the "rugged individualist," the strong, self-reliant person who "does his own thing" and relates to other people in an informal, egalitarian way. People from many other cultures consider U.S. citizens to be "too individualistic." They think that Americans tend to be selfish, self-centered, disrespectful of authority and inadequately concerned about the feelings of others. Generally, people who hold this opinion have been raised in cultures where it is expected that the feelings and needs of others must be considered when making any decision.

There are many other important differences in assumptions and values that distinguish various cultures. They are too numerous and complicated to discuss here.

Non-Verbal Communication
Non-Verbal communication habits differ from culture to culture, giving rise to distraction if not misunderstanding when representatives of different cultures interact. Non-verbal communication influences many things such as the use of space, or how far from another person you stand when you talk; the use of time, or what constitutes "promptness" and how important it is; and the use of gestures, or how much the hands and arms accompany conversation.

If you are a Latin American, for example, you might decide that North Americans are "cold" because they tend to move away from you when you talk with them, or because they do not touch you when you talk. In fact, they have learned to stand further away from conversational partners than you have, and they have not learned to touch others as a sign of casual friendship.

Communication Skills and Guidelines
Here are some skills you can practice and guidelines you can follow when talking with someone from another culture.

  • Pay attention. Try to clear your mind of its various preoccupations so you can concentrate on what you and your friend are saying.
  • Listen carefully. Set your assumptions and values aside and try to hear not just what other people are saying, but what they mean by what they say. You may find that this requires you to ask a lot of questions.
  • Be complete and explicit. Be ready to explain your point in more than one way, and even to explain why you are trying to make a particular point in the first place.
  • Ask for verification. After you have spoken, try to get confirmation that you have been understood.
  • Ask your friend to restate what you have said by saying something like this: "I want to be sure I made myself clear, so would you tell me what you understood me to say?" It does not usually work to ask your friend "Do you understand?" Most people will say "yes" to that question, whether they understand or not.
  • Do not ask questions that you would not or could not answer yourself. For example, if you could not describe your countrymen's attitude towards women's liberation, do not ask your friend what his countrymen think about it. Following this guideline will help you avoid asking embarrassing or silly questions.
  • Don't be afraid to ask someone for clarification. When you are, or think you may be, having trouble communicating, talk about the trouble you are having. By using phrases such as "I do not understand that point," or "I am not sure how that relates to what you said before, " or "I do not think I made myself clear," or "let me explain why I am telling you this," you can focus your attention on the process of communication--rather than on the topic you were discussing--and try to clear up any confusion.

Relationships With a Language Barrier
It sometimes happens that people communicating across cultures will have a language barrier. That is, the foreign person's English proficiency is limited, as is the U.S. person's proficiency in the foreign person's language. This naturally inhibits their ability to converse with and understand each other.

Nearly all newly arrived internationals from a non-English speaking country experience some difficulty with local American English during the initial part of their stay. After a few weeks of exposure to the local English vocabulary, internationals "tune in" and are able to speak and understand much more easily.

It does take an extended length of time to develop complete proficiency in a second language, and occasional misunderstandings will probably still occur. Try not to let these misunderstandings keep you from trying to establish relationships with people from another culture.

Try to challenge yourself by making the most of your contact and using the language of your host country environment. Having friends here from your home country speak English and use the language is the best way to learn. Avoid falling into the common problem of speaking and congregating predominantly with fellow country-persons who are here. Practicing the language and experiencing the culture is the best way to learn and become more proficient.

 

Last Published: Feb 16, 2024